i officially hate breastfeeding.

I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Actually, Cam hates it and therefore I hate it. Bad latch, sore nipples, not enough milk so he's WAY more fussy. Our routine has totally been thrown off and I'm so done. The lactation consultant came again today (different lady though and she was more of a purist and kind of a bitch) and it was awful. I should have known. When I talked to her on the phone I already got a bad vibe from her -- a very breastfeeding purist, judgmental vibe -- but I wanted help sooner rather than later so she came over. Bad move. Camden was fussier than ever screaming at the top of his lungs every time we tried to get him to the boob. Worse than he's been the last few days. She made things worse being the way she is even if she tried to sugar coat it with fake niceness. I started crying cause I was already overwhelmed from this breastfeeding week of hell.

It really has been a rough week. This sudden effort to breastfeed has thrown a huge wrench into things. One day I'd be optimistic about it cause he'd have a good feed and be content. But most days, he was just fussier and it was much harder. He seemed unhappy and I felt horrible cause he was crying more.

I told myself I'd give it a solid week and see if it got better. Clearly, that is not the case! I've decided it really isn't worth it. We were doing just fine with pumping and formula. He was happier and I was happier.

Breastfeeding just isn't for some babies. And Camden is definitely one of them!