E is 1 month today! that seemed to have gone by fast yet slow. that makes zero sense yet is the truth. 1 mo appt today and she's 8lb 8oz. i thought that was kinda heavy but apparently it's only the 30%. considering she was less than 7 lbs two weeks ago though, she's sure growing quick. this chic can take down 3.5 - 4 oz of milk at a time these days. but last night she slept from about 10pm to 2:30am and then again from 3:30 - 6:30am! B and I hope that was not some freak accident and instead her new sleeping pattern. a nice 4-5 hour stretch would be heaven.
pumping continues. i am pumping as i type this. the good thing about my milk this time around is there seems to be more of it. the crappy thing is i now leak every 3 hours. it's quite disgusting actually, and uncontrollable.
the heat is starting to get to me. poor baby has heat rash all over in addition to her cradle cap on and behind her ears. nothing i can do about either though. and me? i just feel gross by the end of the day. not only am i in the house all day in comfy clothes (cause what's the point otherwise when i have to hold baby most of the day?), hair pulled back and likely not even brushed, no makeup and feeling like a dead mommy, but add spit up and breasmilk leaking all over to them mix and it can get depressing.
i long for a pedi, hair straightening and cut to make me feel like me again. i've always had trouble with the "losing my identity" part of motherhood. this time around, it's much easier and not as much as a shock. but there are still remnants of those identity woes that resurface from time to time.
okay, pumping done. now to try and get a few things done around the house before E wakes up. the mess is driving me batty!!
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